May I Have A Word...?

What was 2015 like for you?

Did you have "one word" that you chose to live out for the year?

I know it's a common, fun challenge for people, and as each December comes to a close, everyone's chosen words begin to float around in various social medias. I remember thinking about it in December of 2014. Throwing the challenge around in my own head, I thought, well, maybe I like the word intention. Being intentional with people and friendships in particular. That's always important, right? Especially for a sensitive soul like me! Although as time started to dwindle and the New Year came, I never wrote anything down and I never "officially" chose a word to be mine.

I think it's awesome how anyone can choose a word before the new year even begins. I completely understand that way of thinking and having that word be at the forefront of each and every day. In taking on the task of choosing a main word, I like to think that everyone actually chooses two words. Remember, intention is always linked to whatever word you may choose. On the flip side, I think it's kind of cool to look at your year in reverse. It takes the pressure off, doesn't it? There you are, at the end of the year, seeing your best moments--the moments you are most proud of--and it's then that you discover the word that encompassed your world that year! Heck, maybe you even had 3 or 4 words. Why limit ourselves?

 Reminiscing over 2015, I've decided that my main word was boldness.

I am an introvert at heart and a semi-extrovert on the exterior. Boldness isn't necessarily my thing although (with intention) I can make it my thing if that makes sense. There were plenty of areas of boldness, but the areas that stood out to me were the following:
 
 Boldness to mend past relationships. 

Boldness to be intentional with people despite how I may feel.

Boldness in my career.

I'm not going to dive into everything personal on this post. To give you a summary, I will say that my heart has been convicted to recognize that I haven't always loved others well. That being intentional with somewhat unintentional people (family and friends) is hard, but, in some way, it keeps your own heart from falling into some kind of bitterness and frustration and makes room for a little bit of hope. I will clarify that it doesn't mean you become a doormat, continue to beat a dead horse, or force your way into having a relationship--on the same note, I've also discovered that healthy, God-given boundaries are quite necessary in life. I think my biggest moments of boldness were particularly in relation to my career. Despite any praise I may receive, I still sometimes struggle with being "good enough" at what I do. I wanted more one on one knowledge to solidify my confidence! I got over my fear of looking stupid (and feeling stupid), became a bit bolder, and messaged multiple strangers in my industry throughout this past year! Most of these people were strangers from Instagram and I asked if I could shadow them. Truly, I felt like a creeper, but everyone was incredibly nice and tried to make opportunities happen. After a big push from a co-worker, I even applied for a makeup scholarship! 

I had some really wonderful moments of 2015. Maybe each moment wasn't exactly "wonderful", but there was something to be learned from them. Being bold isn't as scary as I thought. I think we tend to build everything up in our minds too much. We over-analyze, we're fearful of looking stupid, fearful of the outcome, and all the while we're stripping ourselves of opportunity. Sure, things don't always work out the way I want them too. People will disappoint and opportunities don't always pan out how I think they will.

But dang it.

I am proud of myself for even TRYING.
And I'm thankful for the new found boldness to keep trying.

Friends, may 2016 bring you a word.

"We Must Do That Which We Think We Cannot"

Last year, my friend Cody asked if I would do her eye makeup for a wedding that she was a part of and I reluctantly said yes. I loved watching makeup videos on YouTube and thought it would be so cool to have the opportunity of being a makeup artist someday, but I was freaked out and thought for sure I wouldn't be great at it. However, after completing her eye makeup, she loved it and I was all the more hooked with makeup! She later suggested that I should do the makeup for her friend who was soon to be married. I thought she was out of her mind.

That being said, and after much deliberation, it was a year ago (on October 5th) that I finished my first makeup job on a beautiful bride! 

The photo collage below showcases just a few of the sweet faces I've gotten to work on this past year!

I love being a hairstylist, but I've included my new passion for makeup. I've experienced hard and sad changes in my career, but those changes have definitely opened up a new door of opportunity for which I'm so thankful to the Lord for giving me. Pursuing makeup has taken time, effort, research, practice, money, and a lot of pep talks (and hugs) from others, but I've enjoyed every step of the way!

In my pursuit, I have also found a few things out about myself. I think we all do when we step into something new. To be completely honest, I have experienced so many thoughts of doubt, comparison, and a lack of confidence during this venture. Having the opportunity to do makeup is so fun and exciting, and I don't think I do a horrible job, but I'm just one of those people who is extremely hard on themselves--and possibly a little too meticulous and OCD for my own good. ;) Any job requires training and levels of expertise, but when you freelance in makeup, it's a little hard to do that outside of simply practicing on others, researching through books, and watching YouTube videos. I still have so much that I want to learn, that during this past year, I wouldn't even call myself a makeup artist. I didn't think I should call myself that (or even #hashtag it) while just starting out and thought the experts would think it stupid if I did. I do think anyone should take the responsibility to hone their skill set to a respectable level, but now that it's been a year, I've learned that I need to celebrate the knowledge that I have attained and learn to accept others' praise for a job well done in their eyes--and honestly, believe that myself. Humility is key, but beating yourself up because you aren't someone else is destructive to your soul. Hello! You were never meant to be anyone else but YOU! Yes! Be responsible, actively pursue, research, take classes, etc.--but your identity is in Christ, the glory is His, and despite whatever your career may be, your skill set has been gifted to you for a unique purpose. I will continue to learn and grow, but comparison will always be the thief of joy (those Roosevelts, I tell you).

This past year has been amazing and I'm incredibly grateful for the people and the opportunities the Lord has placed in my path. I have received SO much encouragement, affirmation, and support from my sweet co-workers (especially my girls--Cody, Shelbi, and Colby), friends, clients, my mom, and most of all, my husband!

 It means the absolute world to me and my heart is thankful for you all!